Liberal Jewish Values and Practice Leaflets
Lesbian and Gay Jews and Same Sex Relationships
INTRODUCTION
The last half of the twentieth century saw an extraordinary
shift in public and private attitudes towards homosexuality.
With the passing of the Sexual offences act of 967 private
homosexual acts between consenting adults were decriminalized
and the gradual process began whereby gay men and lesbians adopted
a more visible profile. Today being lesbian or gay is no bar
to holding public office and there are openly gay and lesbian
people working in nearly every walk of life, including the rabbinate.
Today lesbians and gay men are raising children and having marriage
ceremonies. Liberal Judaism is proud to have been in the vanguard
of this change of attitude. all these rights, however, have
been hard won. Sadly, homophobia (the irrational hatred of homosexuals)
still exists in some parts of society, and is sometimes expressed
in violent ways. So, while we celebrate the diversity of God’s
creation, we must not be complacent and we must be vigilant
in safeguarding the rights of gay men and lesbians and of other
minority groups.
THE TRADITIONAL STANCE
The Bible states: “You shall not lie with a man as with
a woman: it is an abomination” (Leviticus 18.22) and also
ordains the death penalty for those who commit this physical
act (Leviticus 20:13). From the standpoint of traditional commentary
these biblical verses outlaw male homosexuality. Many modern
commentators, however, point out that they do not express a
condemnation of the love between a same-gender couple, but rather
state a specific law forbidding the physical penetration of
one male by another. Female homosexuality, or lesbianism, is
not explicitly forbidden or indeed mentioned in the bible, though
such a prohibition was later inferred from the warning against
doing “as they do in the land of Egypt” (Leviticus
18:3 and Sifra ad loc). based upon these biblical verses, a
hostile stance was maintained in subsequent Jewish tradition,
which discussed the precise definition of the offence and its
penalties but regarded the matter as largely theoretical on
the basis (which was definitely a case of wishful thinking)
that “Jews are not suspected of homosexuality” (Kiddushin
82a). The Jewish aversion to homosexuality passed into christian
morality, which in turn influenced the public attitudes and
legal codes of christian countries, including britain.
THE LIBERAL APPROACH
as Liberal Jews we seek to understand the social and religious
reasons behind the appearance of this law in the Torah, but
we reject the idea that it should be used to stigmatise the
relationships of lesbian and gay Jews. From the perspective
of Liberal Judaism, the bible is a compound of perfect divine
Revelation and imperfect human understanding, which challenges
as well as reflects the ideas of the ancient near east. Therefore
we need to make an effort to understand, historically and psychologically,
why the biblical writers believed and legislated as they did,
and then to evaluate their teachings in the light of the factual
knowledge as well as the ethical insights of our own time.
ASSUMPTIONS AND MOTIVES
Why was Leviticus so vehement that a man “should not lie
with a man as with a woman”? The prohibition occurs towards
the end of a list of all the women with whom a man is forbidden
to have sexual relations (such as his sister, his neighbour’s
wife and so forth). This list suggests that the Torah does not
distinguish between one who is heterosexual by nature and one
who is homosexual by nature, but is simply delineating certain
physical acts. indeed, there is an argument to be made that
Leviticus is addressing itself solely towards those men who
use another man sexually as a substitute for a woman, perhaps
due to the unavailability of women, or to impress their power
upon another man. From the Talmud (Bava Metzia 84a) we can infer
that a homosexual act was seen as an imbalance of power between
two men, as if one man is dominating another like a woman. it
is possible that Leviticus therefore saw homosexual acts as
a challenge to the accepted natural order of a world in which
men were supposed to wield sexual power over women. if we look
again at the lists in Leviticus chapters 18 and 20 we also see
that the Torah was trying to differentiate the israelites from
the religious customs of other peoples surrounding them. The
use of ritual prostitution, both male and female, falls into
this category and it has been suggested that the prohibition
arose to warn israelite men away from cultic male prostitutes.
in addition, it is likely that homosexual acts were seen as
a ‘wasting of seed’ (the offence of Judah’s
son, onan, - as related in genesis 38:9-10), which militated
against group fertility and hence survival. all these practices
were regarded as characteristic of pagan societies and unbecoming
the ‘holiness’ of the covenant People. in later
times, the evolution of what we know as traditional Jewish family
life, and the enormous importance attached to it, provided another
vantage-point from which homosexuality seemed an unacceptable
deviation. However, we can at least be clear about one thing:
the Torah is not addressing itself to the loving same-gender
relationships that we see around us today.
FACTS AND UNCERTAINTIES
Modern research has brought to light many facts about homosexuality
but also revealed many uncertainties. it is not known what leads
someone to be or become gay or lesbian: most scientists think
that genetic factors probably determine sexuality but it is
also possible that environmental influences may play a part.
Some would argue that, since homosexuality is no longer regarded
as an illness or a pathology, looking for its ‘causes’
is as pointless as looking for the ‘causes’ of heterosexuality.
Regardless of why a person is homosexual the fact remains that
it is in most cases involuntary and unalterable. organisations
that seek to ‘change’ homosexuals do terrible psychological
harm and would never be endorsed by Liberal Judaism. it is not
known what proportion of the population is homosexual. Some
estimates will say five per cent and some ten per cent, but
there is no reason to suppose that it varies vastly from society
to society. The existence of many Jewish lesbian and gay groups
and synagogues around the world disproves the Talmud’s
theory that Jews are never homosexual! Homosexual relationships
can be fleeting or lasting, exploitative or unselfishly caring.
in other words, just like heterosexual ones.
SAME-SEX COMMITMENT CEREMONIES
as Liberal Jews we believe that a loving, monogamous relationship
deserves to be sanctified in front of one’s family and
community. in britain gay and lesbian marriages performed by
clergy are not recognised by civil law and have no legal validity.
However in december 2005 the new law of civil partnership for
same-gender couples came into force. a same-gender couple may
now go to a registry office to have their partnership legally
registered. civil Partnership gives them almost identical rights
and responsibilities to those enjoyed by heterosexual married
couples. dissolution of the partnership will require a divorce.
Liberal Judaism encourages couples who choose to register their
partnership to affirm their relationship with a religious ceremony,
which might be called a commitment ceremony or Wedding, depending
upon their wishes and the opinion of the rabbi presiding. The
ceremony might look very traditional, with the couple celebrating
their commitment to one another under a chuppah, or it might
be a specially designed ceremony that looks very different from
a traditional heterosexual wedding. Liberal rabbis will only
perform such a religious ceremony once the couple have registered
their civil partnership. Liberal Judaism has prepared a booklet
of creative liturgy for the use of rabbis and same-gender partners
planning such ceremonies.
This publication, entitled, B’rit Ahavah – Service
of Commitment for Same- Sex couples, is available from Liberal
Judaism.
CONCLUSIONS
1 . We believe that it is morally wrong to harbour prejudice
or to practise discrimination against lesbians and gay men.
We reject the use of the Torah to justify such discrimination.
2. The expression of such prejudice or discrimination violates
some of Judaism’s most fundamental ethical teachings,
including the prohibition against judging our fellow human beings
until we have been in their situation (Avot 2:4), and the injunction
to judge everyone favourably (avot 1:6). Prejudice also breaks
the prohibition against “wronging with words” (“ona’ah
bi-d’varim”, Bava Metzia 4:10), and is strongly
to be condemned.
3. It is a historical fact that homosexuals have suffered much
prejudice, discrimination and persecution, along with other
non-conforming minorities. it is no coincidence, and it needs
to be remembered, that homosexuals suffered and died in Hitler’s
concentration camps alongside Jews and others. This fact should
make Jews especially sympathetic towards gay men and lesbians,
on the principle that “you know the heart of a stranger”
(Exodus 23:9).
4. We stress the importance of a loving, monogamous relationship
for both heterosexuals and homosexuals. We therefore deplore
both promiscuity and adultery. in a climate where sexually transmitted
diseastes and HiV/aidS are on the increase, the practice of
promiscuity is an assault against ‘p’kuach nefesh’,
the preservation of life. Promiscuity also militates against
the deep and loving union of two souls that is central to the
Jewish idea of love and marriage.
5. The objection that homosexuality contradicts the commandment
to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 9:) is invalid,
since so many lesbians and gay men are now raising children
of their own. We also recognise that there are many creative
ways in which to fulfill that commandment without having children
of one’s own. 6. We place the highest importance on Jewish
family life. We recognise that a stable family provides the
most desirable milieu for the raising of children and for the
practice and transmission of our faith. We acknowledge that
the definition of ‘family’ has changed considerably
and we affirm the right of Jews to create the type of family
unit that best suits who they are.
7. The Torah states that we are all created “in the image
of God” (Genesis 1:28). We affirm the right of gay men
and lesbians to live as the people god created them to be.
POSTSCRIPT
We know that the views we have expressed will not be shared
in all respects by every member of our section of the Jewish
community, but we believe that they express a broad consensus.
in any case, to set the subject in its proper perspective, we
want to end by emphasising that, while Judaism does indeed call
for exemplary conduct from its adherents, this is not only,
or even primarily, in the realm of sexual morality. exemplary
conduct is first and foremost a matter of respecting the divine
image in every human being, of practising truth and love in
all personal relationships, and of promoting social justice.
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